It seems that any time I open myself up to question and answer time with brides, the question always comes around about them looking for ways to incorporate their children into their wedding. These are typically women who are on their second marriage, usually widowed or divorced. As much as I hate divorce (being a child of divorced parents myself), I understand that it is something that many couples go through. Many other brides are simply looking for ways to include younger siblings or other family members into their weddings. But if you’re on your second marriage, or have just been a single mom struggling to raise your kids by yourself, then it’s understandable that you would want them to have some part in your wedding ceremony. Here are some great places in your ceremony where you can easily include your children in your wedding.
Giving the Bride Away
This is a popular choice for moms with sons.
Instead of having your father walk you down the aisle, why not have your son do it. He has had you all to himself for so long, that having a part of giving you away to your new husband may help him to accept that he will be sharing you from now on.
Juinor Bridesmaids & Groomsmen (or Flowergirl and Ringbearer)
Another popular option for including children in your wedding is to ask them to be junior bridesmaids or groomsmen, or if they are really young, to be flowergirls or ringbearers. They can wear an outfit resembling that of the rest of the bridesmaids, or of the bride, and can really be a part of things, and front and center when the wedding vows are read.
Special Readings or Music
If your child has a special musical skill, such as singing or playing a musical instrument, then why not ask them to prepare a special piece for you on your wedding day? Ask them to sing a song or play a special. If they aren’t at all inclined to do anything musical, then why not ask one of them to read a special passage or scripture reading for you instead. I’m sure they’ll love being involved and having such a special part of your wedding.
Include them in the Ceremony
If none of these really seems like they will work for your child, then why not include them in the unity candle ceremony, or other kind of symbolic ceremony that you have prepared. For example, if you are lighting the unity candle, have your children go with you to light the candle, signifying that you are all becoming a family with the lighting of the candle. Be sure to ask the officiant of the service to mention their names several times as well during the vows and other speeches during the ceremony so that they will feel included and extra special during the wedding.
One thing to be prepared for though if you are planning on having children in your wedding is to expect the unexpected. Don’t be surprised if the children act a little silly, a little frightened or shy, or turn into a clown being in front of a crowd. Even a child on their best behavior is bound to slip up a little bit, so just be prepared for anything, and remember to have fun on your special day.
Tags: children in wedding, include children in your wedding, second weddings
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