Wedding Help

Depending on your culture or religion, you may have several different options when it comes to what kinds of wedding prayers will be offered during your wedding ceremony. Sometimes, the officiant offers some personal and improvised wedding prayers or a specially written wedding prayer calling for the long life and never ending love for the bride and groom.  Other wedding customs have the officiant or other person with a role in the wedding ceremony, such as a family member of the bride and groom reading wedding prayers from a special book. A couple may be able to look through the different wedding prayers available to them, such as in one of these special prayer books and choose a prayer for their marriage, or they may write their own wedding prayers and give them to the officiant to read during their wedding ceremony. Still other cultures and religions have the couple offering their own wedding prayers to the Lord for His  blessings and favor upon their new marriage. This is what my husband and I did in our wedding ceremony, and I would advise it to anyone.

Setting the Scene

My husband and I are Independent Baptists, and so doing something like this was never really dictated by our culture or religion.

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Tags: wedding prayer, wedding prayers

One tradition that is another major part of many different kinds of wedding ceremonies is the use of unity candles.  However, don’t let anyone fool you, the tradition of using unity candles does not date back hundreds of years, neither is it bad luck if you choose not to use a unity candle in your wedding ceremony. Typically found in Christian weddings, unity candles have only been showing up during the past few decades, not nearly as long as some of the other wedding traditions out there, such as a white wedding dress or using wedding rings. Unity candles can be distinguished by a large candle in the middle, and two thinner candles (called tapers) on either end. If you like the idea of using a unity candle, and are looking for ways to incorporate them into your wedding ceremony, then here are some of the main ways that couples use them.

Parents Lighting the Tapers

One way that many couples choose to do their unity candle is to have their parents light the tapers during the processional. Once they are escorted down the aisle, the mothers of the bride and groom  walk up to the altar and light a taper candle in honor of their son or daughter before taking their seat. The tapers stay lit throughout the ceremony, until the bride and groom light their unity candle. The bride and groom light their unity candle, each taking the taper that their mother lit, and together they light the larger candle in the middle.

Having the Tapers Already Lit

This is the way that my husband and I choose to do our unity candle. Instead of having our mothers come up and light the candles,  we had them lit before the service started. They stayed lit throughout the whole service, and when we lit the candle, it was a symbolism of two individuals becoming one in Christ. The only problem with this is that the tapers ended up staying lit for a long time, and some of the ribbons and decorations on the tapers actually ended up getting a little bit burnt.

Other Family Members Lighting the Tapers

Since there is no set way to do unity candles, you can really get creative with it. If you’ve been married before, you can have your children light the tapers on your unity candle, or perhaps have your grandparents light the unity candle along with your mother. Or perhaps you have a particular uncle or aunt you are particularly close to, any one of these people can light the tapers.

Unity Candle Alternatives

If unity candles aren’t really your cup of tea, then there are some great alternatives to unity candles that you can do.  A sand ceremony is getting pretty popular, with couples using different colors of sand and pouring them into a vase that they can keep as a decoration later.  There are also rose ceremonies, water ceremonies, and much more.

Unity candles are a great visual example of the idea of marriage. Two individuals becoming one through marriage, with different personalities, strengths and weaknesses. If you have any comments on unity candles, be sure to write in and let me know.

Tags: sand ceremony, unity candle, unity candles, Wedding Ceremony, Wedding Traditions

One wedding tradition that seems to be an underlying theme in all weddings, no matter the religion or country, is to have some kind of a wedding prayer, or many different wedding prayers at different times during your wedding ceremony. A wedding prayer can be performed by your minister, or person performing the wedding ceremony, by a family member, or other spiritual adviser with whom you are close. There is no set number of different kinds of wedding prayer that you will be held to, I believe our wedding had three or four different prayers, including a time when my husband and I knelt at a prayer bench to pray. The different kinds of wedding prayer are meant to ask God’s blessing and His presence during the service.  Typically, there are two different times during your wedding ceremony when a prayer will be offered. To help you have some idea of the typical kinds of wedding prayer found in a wedding ceremony, here is a little guide to help you out.

The Invocation Wedding Prayer 

The invocation is the first kind of wedding prayer that will be offered. It is typically done by the minister, and is meant to “invoke” or ask God’s presence in the service. Also, it is asking the Lord to bless the service that is about to begin. Your minister should have a prayer that he typically uses for weddings, so you shouldn’t need to worry about it.  If you like, you can ask your minister what he usually says. When we sat down with our pastor to go over the order of the ceremony, he explained what he would be asking for in each prayer so that we understood how the service would flow together. It was really helpful.

The Second Wedding Prayer

So I didn’t know what to call the second wedding prayer, so I’ve aptly named it the second one. The second wedding prayer is typically done after the wedding vows and the rings have been exchanged. It is asking God’s blessing and care on the couple as they start their new lives together - and strength to make it through the hard times. This prayer can be done by the minister, or by a family member or person close to the bride and groom.

Other Wedding Prayers

There are several places you can insert other wedding prayers into your wedding ceremony. As I mentioned before, my husband and I had a prayer bench where we knelt to pray after the unity candle.  Also, we had a close family member come and read scripture during our wedding ceremony, and say a short sermon about marriage. Then, after he was finished speaking, he said another wedding prayer asking the Lord to bless our marriage.

A wedding prayer is an important aspect of your wedding ceremony. Not only is it a wedding tradition that has been around for generations, but a time of asking God’s blessings on your lives together in your marriage.  Hope this little guide to the different wedding prayers has helped.

Tags: invocation, Wedding Ceremony, wedding prayer, wedding prayers

I believe one of the last things I did while I was doing my wedding planning was to come up with a list of wedding ceremony songs that I wanted to use. This isn’t because it wasn’t very important to me, or that I had forgotten about it until the last minute, I just didn’t know much about the songs typically played in weddings, and I was sure which songs I wanted to have sung as specials during the wedding either. I believe I literally met with the pianist and the couple doing the specials probably about two days before the wedding to go over the wedding ceremony songs that I wanted. If you are working on picking out your wedding ceremony songs and need some help, then here are the main times in your wedding ceremony that you’ll need to have wedding ceremony songs picked out for, and what I did for each area.

Wedding Ceremony Songs for the Guest’s Entrance

About half an hour before the wedding ceremony was to begin, we asked the pianist to play wedding ceremony songs that were classic love songs, such as “You are so Beautiful”, and “The Way You Look Tonight”. I didn’t go through with her to pick out every one of those wedding ceremony songs because if you think about it, there are a lot of songs that fit into a thirty minute time frame. So I gave her some of my favorites, and she played those plus others that were well liked as well.

Wedding Ceremony Songs for the Seating of the Parents and Grandparents

After all the guests are seated and it is time for the wedding ceremony to begin, you’ll want to have a noticeable silence, and then head into the wedding ceremony song you have chosen for the seating of the parents and the grandparents. The reason for the silence, and then the song is to let the guests know that the wedding ceremony has begun. There are lots of great wedding ceremony songs for this, and I chose to use “On Wings of Song” by Felix Mendelssohn. It’s beautiful. This song was also re-played while my husband and I lit the unity candle and prayed together on a prayer bench we had set up.

Wedding Ceremony Songs for the Processional

Once the parents and grandparents are seated, then you will want to have a wedding ceremony song chosen for the entrance of the groom and his groomsmen, and the bridesmaids. Perhaps the most popular wedding ceremony song for a processional is the “Canon in D” by Johann Pacuelbel, which is what we used as well. It’s a classic.

Wedding Ceremony Songs for the Entrance of the Bride

Now, typically most brides want to enter in to the Bridal Chorus, which is the traditional music brides walk down the aisle to. There are many couples I know though, who prefer to walk the aisle to another song, such as “Someday my Prince will Come”, or other such songs, and there is nothing wrong with it. The same goes for the recessional. You can go with the traditional “Wedding March” like I did, or choose your own song.

Wedding Ceremony Songs for Specials

One thing I really wanted to have in our wedding ceremony were specials sung by friends of mine in the church. They sing beautifully together, and they had a CD written and performed by friends of theirs that were Christian love songs, beautiful and one of a kind. I listened to the CD, and then asked them to perform my favorite songs. So we had two specials in our wedding ceremony, to the songs of “I Delighted in the Lord (and He gave me you)”, and “With all my Heart”.

Going through the list of wedding ceremony songs to use for your wedding can be daunting, because there are a lot of them out there. Luckily, I had a pianist who was excellent and knowledgeable about what kinds of songs are typically used in weddings, and she could play all of them, and friends who also knew a lot about music, and had the patience to go through and play all of the different wedding ceremony songs for me. Your wedding ceremony songs really help to set the mood for your wedding ceremony, and I was so thankful to have such great help with that.

Tags: Wedding Ceremony, wedding ceremony music, wedding ceremony songs

I’ve said it before in previous articles, but when I was doing my wedding planning, the last thing I really thought about for our wedding was the church decorations. So the week before the wedding I was hurriedly making pew bows and choosing how I wanted to decorate the altar with columns and flower arrangements. Needless to say, I wouldn’t recommend that option to most brides out there, as last minute arrangements like that can get a little stressful. One of the debates going on in my mind during that week was whether or not I needed or wanted wedding aisle runners for the church, when to lay them out, and other issues involving the wedding aisle runners logistics. So if you’re wondering if you should use wedding aisle runners, and are looking for some advice then you’ve come to the right place.

Personally, I’m glad that I chose to use wedding aisle runners. It really added a lot to the way the church looked, and honestly if the wedding aisle runner hadn’t of been there, the church would have looked a little empty. I looked around, and found a local party store that carried wedding aisle runners, and they were all around $10. Not a huge price to pay for the elegance and beauty that they can add to your wedding ceremony. Now for the logistics piece of it.

You can really work your wedding aisle runners any way you’d like to. I chose to have two of our ushers extend the wedding aisle runner to the front after the last bridesmaid had taken her place at the front. Now, I placed the aisle runner roll at the back, and had them run it to the front, but you can do it the other way too if you’d like, it’s all a matter of preference. But the wedding aisle runner was in place before my Dad and I stepped into the church.

Like I said before, I can’t tell you how much the wedding aisle runner added to the church. Wedding aisle runners can be used in outdoor weddings, indoor weddings, in any place the bride and groom will be walking. If you’re wondering if wedding aisle runners are right for you, only you can answer that. But they really made a difference in our wedding, and I’d highly suggest them.

Tags: aisle runners, wedding aisle runners